Worrying and trying out dictation app for iPhone

I'm really nervous about stopping working. I've never not worked even when I was in college I always worked. I'm worried about Brandon I'm worried about the stress of him being the sole breadwinner of the family.

I'm worried that we won't be able to handle everything with just one income not because we can't afford to, but because we are used to a certain standard of living and I know that we're going to have to make a lot of cutbacks and sacrifices in order for me to do what I'm about to do so that I can finish school year and a half sooner. I really love my hubby and I really don't want a kill him with stress and anxiety.

I'm also worried about my time management. It's really important to me that this decision be a good decision that it be good for myself and my family and that it provide me with more efficient time is not less efficient time use more motivation not less motivation. once I stop working and I'm just going to school I'll have a lot more time but I'm worried i won't be able to use it as efficiently.

By the way this blog post was blogged using the dragon dictation system on my iPhone. It allows me to speak my blogs and speak my words rather than trying to type on a very very tiny keyboard.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Making a go...

I'm going to try not wking for a while. It'll let me fin sch a yr sooner& lower the stress lvl. I'm also getting use to typing on my iPhone & trying out this new blogging app. So far I like it a lot. I can definitely see myself getting addicted to this! Lol! My last day of wk is next fri as of now. More to come when I get home to my nice big keyboard!

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Soundtrack: Building a Mystery

Song: Building a Mystery by Sarah McLachlan
Anime: Vampire Hunter D

Made: Not by me LOL!

Tai Chi

I'm really enjoying my Tai Chi classes. I can only go once a month or so b/c I have to pay for them as a private lesson b/c there aren't enough ppl interested for the instructor to form a class. But, I've been practicing at home too. I'm trying to go through the forms/exercises at least three times a day. I like the fact that my instructor keeps the martial aspect of the art and explains where the movements can be strikes/throws/etc. At the same time, the slow pace and the soft rhythm of the movements is so calming (although the physical side sneaks up on you...you think you feel fine/that it's not hurting and then out of nowhere ... BAM!) I've been taking Tai Chi b/c I hurt my arm a couple of weeks ago. I found a lump on it, and the doctor said I strained it (or that it might be a lipoma). I have to take it easy for another week to see if it goes away. If it doesn't I'm suppose to go back to the doc. So, for another week I can't do high impact stuff like Wing Chun.

If I could, I'd focus all my weekly classes on Tai Chi. It originally started out in Buddhist tradition which is ironic considering I just recently started checking out Buddhist meditation.

Life, the Universe, and Everything...

"He had noticed that events were cowards: they didn't occur singly, but instead they would run in packs and leap out at him all at once.” ~ Neil Gaiman

Right now I have a very VERY needy tabby curled up on my lap that is trying to make blogging as difficult as possible. And it seems he only wants loving when I pick up my computer. Evil cat.

Sometimes it's good to take a mental check. A moment to gather one's thoughts and reassess momentum. I'm trying to finish graduate school. Much of what I want for myself, my husband, and my family hinges on completing it quickly. Yet, I also know that finishing school never makes things "easier." If anything it only adds more complication and responsibility. (And don't we all just want to be Peter Pan and never grow up?) Right now I'm trying to take pleasure in the small things and attempt to "slow down" as much as possible. Meditation is helping a lot with that as is Martial Arts. I haven't been able to work out as much as I would like the past few weeks. Between Amanda dying, school approaching finals, work stress, etc...I feel lucky to have had time to sleep and do the dishes. Then to top it all off, I hurt my arm, further frustrating my workout:P

I lost 5lbs though since I started! (yippy!) I have to keep going and get back into shape. (I think I can! I think I can!) :D

Brandon is stressing out more and more with the oil spill in the gulf. Louisiana's economy depends on oil. (Say a prayer for us and all families that work in the oil field in the South right now.)

Currently Reading: Neverwhere by Neil Gaiman (it's my favorite book and I'm re-reading it) and the manga Vampire Knight.

Ouchies...

I have a weird lump on my elbow that's a little bigger than a quarter but smaller than a golf ball. It's been there since last Tues. but I didn't want to freak anyone out before I could get to a doctor. I went Monday. He said there's a fatty patch on the elbow and that underneath it, it's likely irritated/inflamed and that's causing it to "lump out" all gross like. At least it doesn't look like cancer. I'm on anti-inflammatory pills and ice packs. If it doesn't go away in two weeks I gotta go back b/c it could also be a lipoma (which is when the fatty cells grow on their own in a benign way). It makes my fingers tingle. Ewwy!
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soundtrack: boom ba

The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus

Just finished watching Heath Leger's last film. I love when Johnny Depp says: "Nothing is permanent, not even death." In many ways I felt like all the characters in the film were acting out of their own selfish interests. The morality and the hang man. Death and life, inevitability.

The really interesting part was the struggle surrounding individual choices as the lines began to blur. How do you know which "choice" is the right one? Heaven and Hell are rarely so well defined as clearly written lettering on a door. It reminded me of I <3 Huckabees. It's a movie that would go well with late night delirium coupled with amateur philosophizing. LOL! :D